The art of uncoupling is a particularly sensitive process that I offer to couples who have striven for years to stay together but reach a point where that option has run out. Often this is not a mutual conclusion so the work here is to tread carefully and allow folks to find a path of greater understanding, ownership and when possible, forgiveness both for themselves and their partner. My goal is to help couples not “throw the baby out with the bath water” which is tempting but a disservice to both parties and the family they created. My hope is to help couples find meaning in and respect for that shared life even as steps are being to leave it. This a multi-faceted process unlike any other in my practice. For couples to reach this moment means that there is a great deal of pain that needs to be sorted and shared to get to the pragmatic solutions so necessary for the outcome to be optimal. The nuts and bolts of the how and when are cranked out in very specific terms. When should the children be told and what should be shared? How to communicate with parents, in-laws; friends, workmates and bosses. The goal is to create a new form of trust in a life apart yet still shared through children and history. There is grief and loss and often a sense of failure that accompanies uncoupling while simultaneously crafting a viable relationship apart. Not all couples want or need to do the deeper work of uncoupling but I provide an environment for that journey as well as a safe setting if the goal is simply to plan the logistics. I meet the couples where they are and guide them toward reaching their goals.
"Jill was able to compassionately, yet purposefully, unearth the root issues that had left our marriage of twenty-five years in a tenuous place; helping each of us to better understand and take ownership of our unique contributions to the state of our relationship. After lots of hard work, patience, and, with Jill’s help – a newfound empathy for each other, our sessions with Jill fostered an ease of communication and understanding that was very difficult for us to elicit before meeting her. I am pleased to report that now - thirty-five years in - our marriage is stronger than ever. The profoundness of Jill’s impact on our lives cannot be overstated."
“I have referenced your blog to others many times. You do really and truly get it! There is something about reading the journey taken by someone else to make our own journey easier and to view the sometimes difficult experiences with another’s understanding perspective.”
Riverview School parent
"Ms. Edelman is an extremely insightful, caring, compassionate therapist who is able to quickly get to the core of an issue. She has helped me as an individual for many years as well as as part of a couple. In fact, I do not believe that I would have been able to find love without her help. You could not ask for a better professional to help you with any issue. I highly recommend her to all."
"Jill’s attentive approach and warmth set me at ease within moments in our first session. Her regard for my emotions and her heightened listening skills gave rise to trust between us that allowed me to grow exponentially. I cannot express my gratitude enough to Jill for the work we’ve done together."
"I have known Jill professionally for over 20 years. She is an absolutely fantastic therapist, that cares deeply for her patients, is easily accessible and always has solid advice and recommendations. She has helped me personally as well as in my marriage, work thru issues as they have arisen over the years. I owe her a great deal of credit for the person I have become today. I consider her a part of my extended family, she has been that important in my life. My wife and I regularly say to each other "thank you Jill".
Jill helped me tremendously over a 20 year period. She is perceptive, smart, articulate, humorous and as another reviewer put it, “she hits the nail on the head” with many issues. I was in a very difficult marriage when I began seeing Jill, and she got me through the remainder of my marriage, and years later a very lengthy, difficult divorce. I credit her with that and will always be grateful. Through the process, Jill helped me understand my family background and some of the reasons I had the issues I had and have. It took time to unravel, as it is hard work, but I gained so much clarity which has stayed with me ever since. Jill is a very caring person and her guidance and help were thoughtful in all ways. She gave me the insight I could handle and needed in real time. I recommend Jill highly
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