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Aiming high to achieve what matters most: Connection; Communication and Mutual Respect

The Apartment Challenge Continues: 6-9-11

The Apartment Challenge Continues: 6-9-11

By Jill Edelman . 4:55 pm

Does It Take A Village To Find An Apartment?  What was viewed as a no-brainer a couple of months ago, finding a two-bedroom apartment in the desired complex, is now a daunting task. We have spread our search to other apartment complexes and buildings. The other mother and I, our realtor and the service manager from Ability Beyond Disability, met in 95 degree heat to view both the aforementioned Victorian and another two-bedroom near by. What I realized in last night’s 3 a.m. ruminations was the impossibility of the Victorian because the laundry room is below an Adams Family type stairwell, no central a.c. and perhaps wiring and sash windows that don’t meet safety requirements. But we all trotted over there just in case the landlord would be amenable to some “modifications”.

What matters most, spacious rooms and a huge porch (the Victorian), with two full bathrooms and more privacy for the girls or an updated conventional apartment with less space, limited storage, central a.c., modern kitchen and a basement room with washer/dryer and enough space for a treadmill, T.V. and a couch?

The Staff Factor: Throw into the equation that there will always be a staff person in the apartment who will need room for a computer/desk and of course, “personal space.” A further complication is getting potential landlords to consider our rental offer. Both apartments are asking more than the rent subsidy allows.

Deadline?  You bet. For staff to be hired, an address is needed. Optimal would be a July 1 or August 1 lease. It will take a month to just fix up the place. We are running out of time. The rental market is tight and within our price range, there is not much around. Fortunately, the other mother and I manage to land in the same place mentally after viewing apartments. That bodes well for the  future relationship of parenting these girls’ residential life together. Though ABD staff are in charge, you can be sure that both sets of parents will have opinions and input regarding the girls cohabitation. How complicated can this be? As a psychotherapist, I have no illusions here. It can be very complicated. Fingers crossed, with some smarts and some luck, it won’t be.

Packing Up The Car: In the meantime, I am already loading the car for an early Friday morning departure, with two dresses for our daughter to choose from for her final dance; my ever ready camera bag; a couple of boxes of silent auction donations; the painting of Sandwich Harbor; the DVD Annapolis with James Franco, which my daughter requested as a graduation gift (she has a fondness for military men); and a bottle of Advil to be placed in the glove compartment.

Graduation Weekend Is Always A Whirlwind: The end-of-year weekend at Riverview, whether we are celebrating a graduation or just attending one, is intense. With family coming from all over, conferences with teachers, packing up and this year, saying goodbye, there is a dizzying effect, at least for me. I feel like you do when you are spun around too fast, in a dance, a game or an amusement park ride, jubilant but a bit off my footing.

Jill Edelman, M.S.W., L.C.S.W. 2011

Developmental Disorders, Parenting Adult Special Needs: One Day At A Time, Special Needs, Special Needs Parents

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  1. jilledelmanlcsw says

    at 9:45 pm

    Dear Emily,

    I have a photo for you from The Project Forward graduation. I will email it. I can also print it up anytime and mail it off. Thank you for your description of the girls last several days. And your visit with our daughter. I am deeply touched by your last comment. That Christina exceeded expectations speaks to never giving up, always believing in our children, and fighting the fight to get them as far as they can go. Hurrah for you and Christina. Great job. See you at graduation.

    Reply

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