Ready Or Not: I think I am ready for the hand-off. More importantly is our daughter? I think so. I’m beat. But this is not about Mom. This is about our daughter and I think she is ready too. Home is good but it includes a “nagging mom” and nagging moms, at some point, are best living in a different town or at least a different house. Our daughter, worn out from a busy weekend, could not get up this morning so she was forty-five minutes late for her DSO (Day Option Services). Now she is gabbing on the phone with a former schoolmate from Riverview School. Listening to them from another room (and you can’t help but hear our daughter’s animated voice and gales of laughter) delights me. They gossip and laugh about old jokes. It is so teen and young adult. I love it.
The But: Well, here is the but: I have to get her to go up to bed. And when she lives elsewhere, I won’t have to do that and she will have her apartment-mate to share in that curfew, or whatever their apartment staff person comes up with. It won’t be me and hopefully I can return to putting myself to bed each evening, along with the cat and dog. Hubby always precedes me to lights off. Son is totally autonomous. And the daughter will be tucked in by her new adult life. That’s a good thing, truly.
Between the wake-up call, and call again and again, and the night time “go to bed” begging scene, the relief from not having to remind, nag and insist, will be huge.
Dining Room Table And A Pick Up Truck: I did buy the dining room set today to share with the OM (other mom). And delivery will be Thursday. Now we need the other dad and his pick-up truck to take a table for the television from our house to transport to their apartment. Still to buy are incidentals, ice trays and the like. Awaiting mail delivery of comforter and towels, sheets are here. Suitcases will be pulled out this weekend, stuffed with stuff, and hauled over to the new place. But first I need to sleep. Busy weekend, sleepless in Connecticut last night, and busy day today.
Is Our Daughter Excited? Good question. I am going to ask her. Hold on a minute, I’ll ask her.
Answer To The Question: “How are you feeling about moving into the apartment next Monday?” “Fine.” “Well, actually good. I can’t wait to get away from this annoying mother. Parents are annoying. And B…(apartment-mate) feels that way too.” “She does?” “Yes she does.” “Oh, did you girls talk about that? ” “Yeah.”
The Feelings Are Mutual: Our daughter has been home for about six weeks now. That’s enough! She’s ready. I’m ready. And apparently her apartment-mate is ready. What more could you want? And best of all, we can see her and do stuff together and be mother and daughter, whenever we want. And family. Fingers crossed, I will sleep more, exercise more, and she will be nagged less and thrive. All good, as they say. All good. Only one problem: It will be a bit boring around here. She lights up whatever space she is in…the lightening bug of my life. Oops, I can feel the lump in the throat. MOM! She is virtually next-door.
©Jill Edelman, M.S.W, L.C.S.W. 2011